


Ten Minutes of Screaming

by mercutiglo



Series: Jonny's Season Two "Ideas" [1]
Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Artifact Storage, Elias is being a dick, Ficlet, Fluff, Screaming, sorta crack fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-13
Updated: 2019-07-13
Packaged: 2020-06-27 17:21:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19795477
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mercutiglo/pseuds/mercutiglo
Summary: There's a noise in Artifact Storage and someone's gotta go investigate it.(Set sorta pre-S1)





	Ten Minutes of Screaming

Some days the Magnus Institute is a peaceful, quiet building.

Some days, in the middle of lunch time, there’s just a mysterious screaming coming from Artifact Storage. 

Martin, Tim, Jon, and Sasha were sat around a table together in the kitchen where the microwave was, Sasha and Jon both busy looking at something on their phones while Tim and Martin were talking when the screaming started. None of them jumped or anything - it wasn’t even all that strange at this point - but they all looked at each other, trying to figure out whose turn it was going to be this time to find out what the source of the Weird Noise™ in the Archives was this time.

“I dealt with it last time, so one of you guys can handle it” Sasha said, grabbing what remained of her lunch and left to go back to her desk, leaving the three guys to figure out who it was going to be.

“I’m your boss, so one of you two-” Jon started before Tim interrupted him.

“Jon when was the last time you didn’t pull that card? Have you ever been on scary noise investigation duty?”

They both looked at Martin to solve the issue of who it was going to be. “You know, Tim does have a point, Jon.”

“Wow! Not even you’re on my side!”

“There aren’t sides, Jon! Sasha did it last time, Tim did it two times before that, I did it.... Pretty much every single time before that. It’s only fair that you have to do it at least one time.”

Jon didn’t say anything as he slowly stood up from the table, glaring at the both of them the entire time. “If either of you so much as thinks about touching my lunch, I will figure out a way to make sure you never leave these archives again.” He walked out

He stopped by his desk on his way towards Artifact Storage, grabbing a massive flashlight out from the drawer as well as his tape recorder, just in case something went wrong, so that he would have it on the record. He started recording as he got closer and the screaming got louder.

“I want it on the record that if I die, I can directly blame Martin Blackwood and Tim Stoker for my death, and the Magnus Institute should perform some sort of investigation. I’m currently standing outside Artifact Storage, where there is some kind of screaming, which I’m certain the tape can pick up. I’m going to hope that whatever is causing the screaming can at least be easily stopped, as I do have work I need to return to and I’m starting to get a bit of a headache. I’m opening the door and…. Elias you piece of shit.” Jon promptly turned off the recording as he realized what was happening and immediately turned around as the screaming that had been going on for far too long suddenly turned into laughter before cutting out completely, the large speaker sitting in the middle of Artifact Storage going silent. “Fuck off, Elias!” Jon shouted as he returned to his desk, hoping no more shenanigans like this would be popping up again any time soon….

**Author's Note:**

> I hope yall are ready because I've got 39 more fics based on Jonny Sims' "ideas" for season two. I'd link the tweet but you know what, I won't ruin the surprise if you haven't seen the list. 
> 
> As always, kudos/comment/subscribe if you enjoyed it, and especially sub if you want to know when the next one is up (honestly it could be later today or tomorrow.)


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